[T]hey are not what happened, they are what we remembered, and how we add meaning to them.
I was listening to a podcast recently on forgetting and its relationship with memory. One of the researchers explained how memories are often prone to being negative or at least bias as “whiteness does not show up on the page” and that forgetting is a healthy approach. It has definitely left me thinking about the place and purpose of memories.
If you never pine for a different past, you’ll stay trapped in a cycle of mistakes.
- Connection regret
- Moral regret
- Foundation regret
- Boldness regret
Brooks explains that the challenge is to “acknowledge it and use it for learning and improvement.” To do so, he provides three steps for contemplating the past:
- Kill the ghost by owning the ghost
- Forgive yourself
- Collect your diploma and build on your experience